It has been some time since I had read Jo's and Alex's blog, A Journey of Faith. When I read it just now, I almost fell off my chair and tears just dropped. All the while it seemed cheery. Jo's doctor told them "to be prepared for the worst" last Tuesday.
These 6 words are all so familiar when Dr. Hwang told my parents that during my first chemo session. If I can be so "normal" now, why can't Jo? It isn't fair! I hate to blame or question God, for I know He has His reasons, but I'm really questioning Him now.
And I'm questioning myself again... The meaning of "me". I feel so useless, helpless and lost right now. Why in the fuck am I still existing on this earth when I can't help people like me since I'm in remission now and experience is always the best teacher. I feel...wasted.
2 comments:
Hey there... was with Jo and Alex tonight. They are rested in the Lord - I'm not sure what you can do. Don't feel "wasted" though, that's not what God wants from you.
Pray and if He leads you to do something, do it :-)
Anyway, I'm certain Jo and Alex appreciate your prayers and in fact Jo mentioned you in one of my conversations so you have already made an positive impact!
:-)
Thanks dd!
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