The Thing About My Boyfriend IS...

Sometimes I really feel like knocking him hard on the head for his irritating-ness. I guess most of you already know who he is...
Anyway, here are some conversations that took place in the past week...

1) We were talking about why some kinda girls only appeal to some kinda guys...
Dear: Guys like that girlfriends to be presentable, so can bring out mah. Like trophy like that.
Me: So I am trophy lah.
Dear: Something like that lah.
Me(Starting to get irritated already): Than I what kinda of looks, what kinda trophy?
Dear: Erm, that kinda girl-next-door look lor.
Me: I don't look like your neighbour mah.
Dear: But the look is different one.
Then he took one of my friends and say that her look is the "upper-class girl-next door" look and that she has a different kinda look compared to my "girl-next-door" look.
Me: But I still don't get it leh.
Dear: Got the village girl, 土乡, look.
Me: So it's the country girl look lah?
Dear: Something like that, very hard to describe lah.
...Say I look toot say so lah...

2) I slept over at his place the other day. We met up at slightly past midnight, on the morning of 24th.
Dear: Happy Birthday!
I was so damn happy lah, because this guy sometimes damn goondu one. BUT when we went for lunch the next day...
Dear: Today what date ah?
Me: You asking me? How can you forget my birthday?
Dear:i know today your birthday and it's on 24th, but just cannot connect.
...Somehow, Dear's brain is wired differently from us, the normal human beings...

3) I finished my paper and we were having lunch just now. He was telling me about his friends getting married and they got together around the same time as us.
Me: Wah, they so fast get married ah?
Dear: Ok lah, we together 3 years coming October right?
I stared at him.
Dear: Not 3 meh? 3 or 4?
...dot dot dot...

4) Today I felt we had kinda good telepathy. Over lunch just now, we were talking about the kopitiam stored-value card and the discounts for each different kinda card. He said something while I was having food in my mouth. So I twisted my index finger and middle back and forth.
Dear: Yah lah, reverse one.
Me: Wah, you know what I mean ah?
Dear: Yah lah, I clever one.
Me: Your 10-years-series throw away liao ah? In this case should say, of course, I understand you mah.
Dear: 把到了(Get already), 10-years-series still keep for what?
...Pure irritating-ness...