Chemo today...

Sleepy... but cant sleep yet... have to wait for the timing to take my last dose of antibiotics...

had chemo today. doc gave booster too although white blood cell count on monday was 9+. think is cos of my infection, so just in case...

Eventful weekend

Friday, dear was on leave so we went out walk walk... first we collected the tickets for just like heaven starring reese witherspoon at cineleisure till "he" stopped me in my tracks. he was as tall as an avg 7 yr old kid. he wore green frame specs and had a very cute little round face. he wore a pair of shorts n t-shirt n just stood there looking at me. n this he told me weeks ago that he has a mission and that's to save the world. his name is chicken little! upon seeing the cute little thing standing there looking at me saying "take me home" i really felt like grabbing him n run for my life, catch a cab n go home, hoping no police will come after me. of cos, feeling like doing it and doing it was a different thing altogether since its a crime to steal. i eagerly shuffled my feet towards the cute little one n wanted to pat him on his head till i saw "do not touch. this display is protected by cctv..." so instead of me playing the baddie, i proposed to dear to grab chicken little for me. he said, u want me or chicken little. lol... so as he pulled me away to get the tickets, my eyes n head followed my chicken little. awwww, so cute... luma luma lei... mai hi, mai hu, mai ho, mai ha ha... the picture of him dancing to this tune telling pple to switch off their mobile phones played again in my mind.
after collecting the tickets, we thn had lunch at pastamania which had loads of garlic. it was so much that till i burped after dinner, we could still smell the garlic. after lunch, its showtime... Touching romantic story, could connect with her "i wana stay alive" character. the way thy fell in love, so subtly n smoothly put across. after the show we walked ard cineleisure a bit till i got caught up with my zhuan zhuan...
its actually toy or small little handphone accessories that comes in small capsules. they are placed in a box. u insert 1 to 3 1-dollar coins in n turn a knob for the capsule to drop out. what comes in the capsule depends on your luck, like my ruffy the other time. this time round, i saw n aimed one mini piglet torch, one piglet handphone accessory and one my melody handphone accessory. dear so good, sponsored for all the capsules. my melody was 1 dollar a piece, got it at the 3rd try. piglet handphone accessory was 2 dollars a piece, got it on the 4th try. the mini torch was the irritating one, at 2 dollars a piece, it came only on the 5th try. total damage was worth 16 dollars of unwanteds.
after all the zhuan zhuan we walked down to paragon's M1 to check out the price for a data cable for sony erricsson hps. dun have... thn we went to wisma's sony gallery, aso dun have... then we went to food republic for dinner. hehe... again... haha... i tried the hand made noodles n he took the fried hokkien prawn mee. after dinner we walked a little while more at taka's mango and cold storage n tt's whn i started feeling lousy. there was a light pain on my right chest. after cold storage, we went home.
at home, pain was still there n it was worse whn i coughed, breath deeply, sneeze or try to talk a little loudly. then my parents came back. n my kiasu mum called dr hwang's clinic straight away. dr hwang advised to go straight to mt. e's a&e rite away. there, a chest x-ray was done, but the resident doc found nothing much. given painkillers and instructions to see dr hwang the next day. dear stayed over just in case i hurt in the nite n cant scream for help.

saturday, went to dr hwang's clinic. while waiting for her to finish her rounds at the ward, i vomitted. n whn i vomit, i could still the pain. i vomitted some of my dinner, apperently by my own experience in this kinda vomitting, its a mixture of indigestion and too hungry.
dr hwang said it was Pleurisy, a swelling and irritation of the membrane that surrounds the lungs. i was given a booster jab n oral antibiotics.
then my parents n i went for brunch while dear went to mit the guys. on the way up to food republic (again! hahaha...), mum n i got our attention on some clothes for sale on wagon display. i bought a 3-quarts for 30+.
my dad tried the zha jiang mian, mum took roti prata, while me, pork sukiyaki. for 16 bucks, the sukiyaki was quite a worth it portion. loads of cabbage n meat, with 2 huge pieces of tofu (abt a quarter of a norm size slab), a small bunch of enokidake (golden mushrooms), 5 slices of carrots and one miserable black mushroom. it was worth it cos it was huge, but surely it did not hurt more to add a few more black mushrooms. taste wise was quite ok...
went home n reminded my dad to make reservations for dinner tonite to celebrate mum's bday in advance. the place we wanted to go to was grand copthorne waterfront but it was full. so we changed venue to melt the world cafe at oriental hotel. but they could only make space for us at 8.30pm. then i took a nap. didnt sleep well the nite b4 cos of the pain. woke up n made our way down to marina square cos my sis wanted to look for something. anyway we are early n marina square was just beside oriental. in the car, i threw up again. threw up a little of my lunch. its another bout of indigestion n being too hungry. upon reaching marina square, immediately looked for toilet to rinse my mouth.
my sis could not find what she wanted so we made our way to oriental. we were slightly early at the restaurant for our dinner but they let us in anyway. but, it was kinda, not full house, with a few empty tables here n there, n i started wondering, y 8.30? ate till they closed shop, haha... but not shiok enough, cos i didnt have the full-till-i-wana-puke-n-stay-off-food-for-a-week feeling. usually on buffets, i would binge till i feel that, but not enough time! haha... went home n watch soccer. dear did not stay overnight cos he was out the whole day n his parents just came back from thailand.

Sunday, was doing cross stitch whole afternoon till dear fetch me out to jelita. did some grocery shopping n bought pizza for dinner. upon reaching home, opened a can of campbell cream of mushroom n ate pizza n watched tv at the same time. after dinner, dear watched soccer while i made cheesecake. mango chilled cheesecake... haven tried yet.. haha...
whn my sis came back (all went out), dear went to central to catch the man u game cos it would be too late n he has to take a cab... save money while we can... haha...

after the eventful weekend, comes today. should be chemo day, but doc say since i still feel the pain, she'll delay the chemo till wed. so mum n i went to walk walk n have lunch. walked over to far east where she bought toto. then went over to isetan scotts supermarket to get some stuff. n on the way there, on the mango window display a top caught my eye, but mango only opens at 11am n it was still early.
so, after grocery shopping n brunch at mos burger, it was shopping time at mango. so so happy! its been sooooooo long since i've slowly walked thru the racks at mango. found a bag and the top. total damage to pocket today, 152 after discount with mango card. damn, i'm such a sucker for mango stuff. Claudia Schiffer is the poster girl for mango now, damn, i envy her...

Chemo on monday...

Had chemo on monday... still a bit drowsy, groggy n sleepy. hopefully, tmr i'll be up n alert...

No much appetite since monday... dunno wht to eat... dun feel like eating aso... haiz... just feel like sleeping... yawnzzzz...

A day of good news and thankfulness

So, i awoke very early today to reach the radiology clinic at paragon for my ct scan n chest xray, appointment was at 8.15am... by the time i finished, it was only 9.15am but report will only be ready abt 11am. however, by experience, you have to give them half an hour added to the time stated. since i fasted the entire nite n had to go without breakfast, my stomach was calling "feed me". but at 9.15, not many eating places are open at orchard.

having eaten kaya toast for the past 2 days, i wanted some warm, hot, soupy noodle kinda thing. so from paragon, we walked to lucky plaza's basement foodcourt. nothing appeals to me. mum suggested scotts picnic foodcourt.

so as we walked, we passed by breadtalk. i had intro to my mum the green tea bread from breadtalk about 2 months back, although i had eaten it long time ago. now, she's addicted to it! EVERYTIME we pass by breadtalk, she would ask "got green tea bread or not ah". so, lucky for her, that outlet had green tea bread for her early in the morning. she saw the mixed loaf of green tea n walnut n she bought 2, one for my aunt n one for ourselves.

the moment we stepped into scotts picnic foodcourt, it looks like nothing was open. i suggested, food republic at wisma atria. had been gog to food republic for a couple of times already. once i've finished trying all the food there, i'll do a writeup. the time we stepped into food republic was already about 10am. so u can guess how slowwwwwly we had walked... pratically strolled...

so at 10am, toastbox was already opened, but no bread for me today... i already insisted on something warm, hot n soupy noodles thingy. so i walked ard. was thinking of duck guo tiao soup or beef noodles dry (its not really dry, comes with loads of gravy instead of soup). but these 2 appealing foods were not ready yet. in the end, after thinking for a while, i was mind set on beef noodles and ask the auntie whn it would be ready. she said gotta wait for boss to come in n cook the gravy... so meanwhile, i went to buy tea n coffee n mum n myself. thn mum went to check if the lotus leaf glutinous rice was ready, but they said 10.30. so she suggested we share a yong tau foo soup while waiting for my beef noodles gravy to be ready.

10.15am: slowly enjoying the yong tau foo soup while i sight a young sweet looking lass walking into the beef noodles stall. and she starts making the gravy
10.30am: i approach the stall again n they say not yet ready. return to seat n ask mum abt the glutinous rice. mum says she'll wait for them to push the dim sum cart out. if they come in time, she'll buy, if not, she's gonna forgo. for the next 15 minutes, i keep seeing the young lady adding condiments n trying the gravy. mum n i speculate that the young lady is the boss of the franchise since the auntie say "boss will ocme in and cook gravy".
10.45am: just as yong tau foo soup finished, i sight the young lady pouring the gravy into the warmer pot at the counter. yay! its ready! i approach the stall to get my beef noodles n their first bowl of beef noodles dry is sold for the day.
I'm a damn slow eater. but timing just nice. by the time i finished, it was almost 11.30am. made our way back to collect the report n c my chemo oncologist, dr hwang.

dr hwang read the report n saw the films. i only know how good it was till she start comparing the films with me. my PET scan in august, before chemo started had shown tumors in my liver, including one huge one. using that to compare to the CT done after 2 courses of chemo, the huge one and a few are gone, with the rest reduced in size. using this CT n compare with the one i did today, all are gone except 2 or 3 (if i'm not wrong) n whatever's left had pratically shrinked at least half. After she had explained n pointed out them out, i said "thank God" n held back tears of joy (n now while typing this out, i'm letting out tears of joy). she gave me such a big smile n kept saying, "almost there, almost all gone, just a little more."

then she asked if i'm a christian n which church i go to. i told her i dun go to church but just read the bible n do my prayers at home. she said what's most importantly is to know Him. hehe... then she said 2 more courses for me b4 another scan is done to re-confirm everything's gone. once i'm cleared, i'll start on at least a year's of oral medication to "maintain". she carried on telling me to have a nice weekend n we'll start the 5th course on monday. we walked out of the consultation room. i went to the reception to wait for my appt card while she handed my file back to the nurses at the recep. n while she did that she was smiling n saying to the nurses "xiao le, xiao le, dou xiao le" (referring my tumors shrink already, disappearing already, all gone already). got my appt card then mum suggested buying the yong tau foo n beef noodles for her frd who lives nearby to try (tt's how good it was).

we made our way back to food republic. i went to get the beef noodles while she got the yong tau foo. auntie at the stall saw me and regconised me. she asked if i worked nearby, i said no, here to c doc. the young lady collected the money, pass me the plastic bag n said "c u, take care"... guess she regconised me too.

Heavenly Father, thank You for Your blessings. thank You for protecting my life as You know how much i want to stay alive to fulfil my dreams n aspirations n to do the things i wana do. thank You for tame-ing the cancer cells as to let the chemo drugs work effectively aginst them. papa in Heaven, thank You for loving me, never giving me up n forsaking me though i'm always a lost sheep, always backsliding. Father, i love You! In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen!

No chemo today...

No chemo today again... After seeing doc just now, she wanted me to go for another ct scan before she gives the next dose of drugs. Reason, she wanted a scan to ensure everything's well n if whether she can reduce the dosage slightly...

So tmr morning, i'll have to go for ct scan first before anything else can carry on...

New Park Hotel Peranakan Buffet

Went to this on saturday night with my parents. It is also Peranakan, coming to almost 40 per head, its slightly more expensive than the Merchant Court one, but definately more value for money...

Main dishes: fried cucumber rice, plain rice, fried bee tai mak (lao shu fen)... kueh pie tee, nonya mee (taste a bit like fried hokkien prawn mee) n satay which are damn good... EVERYTHING else was spicy except the braised pork belly n chap chye... the spicy stuff were crayfish, stingray, fish, prawns, buah keluak chicken, etc... they had a few more dishes then the Merchant Court one...

Cold dishes and salad bar: no rock oysters here, but they have tuna n cuttlefish sashimi besides the salmon. potato salad, prawn salad, chickpea salad.

Desserts: miserable n horrible... ice cream, ice kachang, little nonya kuehs n tarts, cakes, mango pudding, blackcurrant jelly, longan n red dates soup, strawberry moose. Only redeemable part was the gultinous rice with durian sauce, think thai style but with very very thin durian puree mixed with coconut milk to make the "sauce".

I just thinking if they have a nonya mee, satay n kueh pie tee buffet. these 3 dishes are really nice... But it seems like their Japanese buffet is more popular...

Swissotel Merchant Court's Buffet

Went to this place last Tuesday for dinner to celebrate my dear's bday... It's more Peranakan than international...

Main dishes: all Peranakan dishes. honey beef, chap chye, black bean sauce crayfish, chicken, shark fillet, mee goreng, plain rice, etc...

Cold dishes n salad bar: seafood salad, fruit salad, n some other salads which i forgot, pieces of lettuce, rock oysters, salmon sashimi, sichuan soup, various types of bread n salad dressing, bak kwa, fried spring rolls, etc...

Dessert: Burbur hitam, sweet corn with egg, steam tapioca (think thai style), ah balling, fresh fruits, little pastries n tarts, cakes, chocolate fondue. and the only worth it part of the buffet, mango pudding, almond jelly n durian puree.

A pity i still can't take spicy food yet, if not i would have enjoyed it more... the honey beef was good. quite value for money, at 30+ (after all the +++) per head.

A little occupied

During the weekend, england had a "friendly" with argentina. note "friendly" cos usually games between these 2 countries not tt friendly after all. lucky there wasn't any ugly scenes this time round... england won 3-2!

I'm starting to get a little occupied now for 3 reasons...
Once in a while, i've mentioned i'm playing trivia on irc n i'm an op in the channel. now i have a little "job" on hand which i'm always suggesting. for a very long time, i wanted to "clean up" error questions n ans, be it typos, weird questions or ans, questions the bot cant "read", etc... now i'm put to task to do it! at last we can start "tidying" up the "mess" n get "organised". phew...
2nd reason is that i'm at last starting on the cross-stitch for my mum's frd. a very kind, sweet, nice, jovial, cheery lady who has been advising me, supporting me, coming down to c me while i'm having my chemo... its a x'mas gift for her.
lastly, re-typing of recipies. i'm a very "niao" person whn it comes to organising stuff. i dun like things when they're outta format, outta place, outta style. so after i ripped hundred plus cheesecake recipies, i'm re-typing them to my format.

Starting my 5th cos of chemo already... went to clinic just now n my white blood cell count is low, ass usual. no typo, extra "s" cos its damn irritating. eat so many egg whites also no use... so given booster jab n went home. tmr gog back for, hopefuuly, official start of 5th cos...

Terrible dream with a Fann Wong look alike...

I just woke up... i think its the first time i'm blogging right after i wake up... i had a terrible dream... i awoke crying...

the setting was like in a class or something similar... a group of us were gathered ard, sitting ard talking. someone suggesting gog to a club tonight for the launch of a new perfume. another gal asked wht perfume. i note a magazine on the table which i had read b4 n remembered the launch party details were inside.

the magazine belonged to this gal, who really looked like fann wong... i dunno y a fann wong look alike appeared in my dream, dun ask y... so i asked "fann wong" if i could flip thru the magazine to show the rest the launch party details. as mean as she could get, she said no cos i had uneven skin tones all over my fave n neck, had pigment probs n dark eye rings and even start jabbing her finger all ard me to "show" me where the uneveness was. i felt ostracised... i fought back, saying her make up was thick n white as a ghost, i had reasons for uneven skin tone n started destroying her make up.

everyone ard saw me doing that n blamed me for wanting to start a catfight. i started crying n explained myself that every gal is vain, who doesn't want to be pretty. n a bitch has to criticise so meanly on my uneven skin tone. i clearly remb saying this words in chinese. "you all look at these black n white patches. u think i want meh? u think i wanan look ugly meh? i have no choice! i had stage 2 nose cancer n needed radiotherapy! tt's wht caused the uneveness. n now i have to go for chemo, tt's wht causes the pigementation probs" i was crying n wailing as i said those words. upon finishing, i woke up, n felt tears running down my face...

it was a nightmare, i still feel like crying now... i dunno y i still wana cry nor do i know y i had such a weird dream. they say dreams are part of our subconcious mind. mayb whn i walk ard everyday i dun seem to bother abt my patches. but in my subconcious, i really bother abt them n want to get rid of them. or maybe its due to pple looking at me in a weird way whenever i'm out. subconciously i think they are looking at me like tt because of my uneven skin tone.

i hate dreams like tt... after u wake up, makes u feel like u are dumped into the sea, struggling to keep alive... help...

3 cakes in a row...

first of all b4 i start blogging today, let me extend my loving-est n warmest bday greetings to my most loving, cutest, handsome and wonderful dear dear...
lao gong ah, happy birthday! love you deep deep... muacks...

okie, now after i'm done with sending everyone's goose pimples out, let me start on wht i've done in the past week... in the last week, 3 cakes were rolled out... an oreo cheesecake, a classic caked cheesecake n a yoghurt cake...

oreo cheesecake still trying to grasp wht happened wrongly to it... it was a chilled cheesecake but it melted wayyy too fast. maybe the gelatine mixture has to be thicker, cos cream cheese doesnt melt tt fast. besides tt, the crust was a failure, not compact enough.

Yoghurt cake, wht my mum wanted to bake. texture was very soft n fluffy. tasty too... everything was good... perfect... except it had a hole at the bottom. most prob its due to the air...

classic baked cheesecake. simply perfect... except maybe can cut down on the lemon juice a bit, too sour... tasted oh soooo good that i think can sell... its was meant as a birthday cake for dear. so after we cut the cake just down after dinner, i brought some home n it was still a lot... so my mum gave a slice to her frd who lives nearby... dear n mum's frd say its a "can sell" standard... woo hooo, its a big big compliment... tmr making another round for my aunt.. hehe...

During the weekend, man u played chelsea. since the russian n portugese brats took over last year, i started to hate chelsea. they pratically bought their title n jose mourino is a big big sore loser... whenever he loses a match, watch his face turn long n black. anyway, when chelsea went into this game, they were on a 40 match unbeaten run... n the outcome, man u won 1-0! although the goal by darren fletcher was a bit taiko, but its was a win after all n it really humbled the arrogant chelsea...

today went for checkups. as usual white blood cell count low lah... given booster. next, went downstairs to c dr khor (radiotherapy), did a scope n everything was alright. so far so good... dr khor even taught me how to massage my neck to help reduce the swelling... hopefully it helps.. hehe...

Bad Canadian pizza...

Ystday was the 2nd dose of my 4th cos. no idea y i'm kinda alert already today. by rite should b still groggy... but getting kinda sleepy already...

the gals came by today to pay a visit. pj started her exams already so she din come over. rather she did not too, rather she stayed at home to revise. so, they were supposed to come by at 1pm. In the end, yue came at 1.30, ange ard 3.30. winn ard 4.30...

we ordered pizza for dinner, but yue went home for dinner. first time canadian pizza tasted so bad. the pizza was flour-zza. could pratically taste the flour-ness of the dough. the tomato paste on the pizza was pathetic! making the pizza tasted so dry. and the ingredients, i think the portion was meant for a reg or medium pizza, not large... bad... real bad... never eaten such bad canadian pizza in my life...