Yep, for 2 weeks, I haven't been blogging. Too busy already cos my life is filled with so much action, it packs up... (k, lame...)
Since 19th Dec, I wake up, bath and prepare to go to school, have lunch, go to school, come back home, wash up n dilly dally a bit n size up what chapters of text I gonna tackle tonite, have dinner, watch a bit of tv while "tackling" a bit, wash up, tackle at full speed and concentration and zzz. Average start of day is at 1130hrs. End of day, 0400hrs.
I had started on the 1st text b4 class started. That's how I study. Read once, attend class and scribble notes, prepare for exams by writing the notes n main points from the text down neatly n properly on lined paper chapter by chapter and then studying or memorise from there.
1st difficulty, topic too dry for me to understand. I'm not politically, economically American, now or future. To deal with these topics are like trying to understand martian language to me, totally outta my radar.
On the day lectures started, I was a chapter ahead of wht our American lecturer wanted to cover for the day. I thought, heng ah... Till he handed out 2 binded "books" and a thick stack of paper stapled together... Each one consisted of questions based on the 2 texts and a film series respectively. I'm someone who dun like to do double work, study-wise too. If these stuff were handed out earlier, I could have read the text n prepared for the lessons, questions already answered for a better understanding. I was completely thrown off track and that was difficulty no. 2... So I told myself, never mind, just speedread the rest of 1st text and when I come to 2nd text, do the questions at the same time while reading the text.
Speedreading was one thing, but you can't remember a shit! Worse is when you have to kill braincells to understand stuff and in one page, you would find "democrats... but the anti-liberals", "left... but the anti-communist", "republicans... but the communists". So many different terms for 2 main political sides. So I had to blur blur, try to make out what's left and right, democrats or republicans, communists or not, liberals or not... And I'm not born and bred in US, and I dun follow politics tt much. Not even local politics! Ask me to name Singaporean political parties, I can only say PAP and WP. Ask me what are their policies, I'll stare at you blankly in the face. I only pay attention to Budget day when taxes or Progress Packages are announced. So imagine, now, I have to know the same thing, but only American. Difficulty 3...
I was quite happy with my study plan. It was quite smooth, till my lecturer announced the "candidates" for the biographies section of the exam. I was thinking, isn't it the 26 bios in the 1st text? Well, the good news is, it's 7 from there, and another 2 not found in the book. So somehow, we have to crunch the 2 texts and form some kinda bio on our own for these 2 gentlemen. Difficulty 4... I'm already 1/3 thru the 2nd text, then you tell me. I didn't mark out those pages!!!
Already so stressed, I was damn flustered. Last day of lectures was last Friday but it already seemed like a year had passed. Feeling so confused, vexed and thrown off track, I was at wits ends at how to prepare for the exam, 2 "make your own bios", 2 freaking essays totaling 14 pages and a written essay for the 3rd section of the exam. I really wanted to dig a hole somewhr, scream and cry to let out my fustrations. So I decided, not to think of anything, but just go over to the post-xmas party at Dear's friend's place n chill out just for the nite.
When I reached home after class to pack, cos gog over to Dear's place to sleep over after the party, I had the sudden urge to stay at home... and study and finish as much "2nd-text-questions" as I can. Dear called me to ask me what time we should mit at central before going over, I asked if I could bring my text along cos I reckon they would play mahjong, and I can stay at one corner n study. If I don't study a bit, I will feel more stressed. After the potluck dinner n a bit of chit chat n tv, it really was mahjong time. They played in the study room, while I stay in the living room to study at the coffee table. Dear came out to see if I was ok every now and then.When mahjong ended ard 0500hrs, Dear and I went back to his place. Knowing I was damn freaking stressed, Dear offered to work out a study plan together with me the next day after we woke up.
Woke up ard 1400 hrs, bathed, had lunch, and we were back at my place. For almost 3 whole hours, Dear went through with me, my notes, text, and whatever I needed for my exams and essays. Then I dropped him a bomb, I did not know how the Congress, Administration, Senate, work, how they win "electoral" seats, what rank in the hierachy is a senator, etc and I had only differentiate what are the terms refering to the right or left side of politics the day before... If I could understand all these, it would be easier for me to vizualise and thus not so dry and hard to understand. Dear did not believe that such "basic" stuff I did not know but did not blamed me cos I dun follow politics. He was kinda surprised that my lecturer did not go through these with us. Maybe he though we knew...
So now, timings for start and end of days have not changed. I've skipped tutorial ystday so I could study and not waste my time there because tutorials are just crunching whtever info there is in 9 days of lectures into 3 days. I'll be skipping the one later, because I definately cannot wake up in time (its 0600hrs now and it starts at 1300hrs). So I'll just go for the one tmr to see what interesting and useful info I can get from there.
I'm having a bad breakout due to late nites (I can only study n concentrate when there's no sun), "auntie" coming soon and stress. I need a deep cleansing mask, but guess what, I dun even have that 5 mins to spare to "beautify" n relax, cos I've already spent an hour here and I'm too stressed up and busy studying to even care how I look... Fairy God-mother, if you exist, pls dry up my pimples and get rid of the scars.
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