Help help...

Issit good or bad whn u last saw someone abt 13 hrs ago n last sms tt same person abt 6 hrs ago, n now u're missing him already... aiyoh, y like tt? i should be "studying" for my FTE tmr... cannot concentrate ah... jiu ming ah... help help...

Dilemas...

All of the sudden, I have this bo liao idea... actually not bo liao after all... tt's to transfer my blog to somewhr else... seems like other blog servers offer much more stuff n control... like your layout, uploading of pics n midi/wav files. not that i'm unable to do it here, but its just too much of a trouble to do it here... plus u need good knowledge of html, for which i have none...

however, the biggie prob is the 190++, almost 200 entries to be transfered... n if u dun log in here for more thn 3 months, all previous entries will cease to exists, which means gone-ed... which will be most prob wht would happen if i move over to another blog, n not transfer my entries over... and which i think i'll spend abt an hour, copying n pasting the entries n changing the dates on them... argh... damn... i gotta quickly decide...

ignorant is bliss, so is being treated like a xing fu xiao gong zu (fortunate little princess)... but i prefer the princess part, though sometimes both is nice... life's full of contridictions, yeah? how long have i not felt this way? since foreva... cant remb whn i was treated like a princess... definately years ago... must enjoy while i can but cannot take it for granted... moments like tis, priceless... for everything else, i do hope thr's mastercard... (heh... k, i c crows fly by) but thr no free lunch in tis world, n the price i pay, lock's getting unlocked... which IS a good things after all...

Clams... not so yummy after all...

Jus got back frm a KTV session... took leave for Thurs n Fri to unwind n relax n rest properly... Got d whole day tmr to run errands, gotta replace an atm card n most impt of all, my ic...

i do feel something now already, but y am i still claming up? y am i such a bitch? how do i stop myself frm claming up? how? someone pls pls teach me n tell me how... help...

Time to wake up...

stupid dumb experiment i did on myself... wanted to c wht r those weird feelings abt... so i tried as hard as i could, not to clam myself up n open my heart a little...

experiment findings: guilty feeling towards another (A) becos of someone else (B)... Want A to kinda give up becos of B... But at the same time, dare not open up to B becos of C... I'm such a loser, afraid of getting hurt again, afraid of a lot of things... tt's y after such a short while, i decided to end the experiment...

i dunno if its due to the stubborn traits of cancerians, no means no... close means close, no opening up... but thinking through, if i dun open up, C will always be thr, and it'll be fucking unfair for B... y am i such a bitch? mayb wht ken said might be bullseye... mayb i'm really starting to feel something, but its the baggage i'm still holding on to and i dun realise it... which i think might be true cos during the experiment, i think i did feel something...

this is so freaking irritating n confusing... mayb its just time to get outta comfort zone n wake up...

Everything... AGAIN...

Flu kicked in again... 3rd time in 6 months, or rather, less than that... place too dusty or i'm not getting enuff rest?

Confessions hurt... to a certain extend... Weird feelings going thru me now... Cant decipher them at all... just weird, funny, even funnier... getting to suspect there's NO such thing as platonic friendship anymore... y do things have to turn out tis way... ken jus put it, u're just too cute n attractive lah... i think otherwise... pissed at myself... damn fucking pissed... y cant i have a simple pure platonic friendship that will stay put n last tt way... y must it be always, in the middle of such a nice friendship, things happen AGAIN... i fucking hate it... it must be me... i fucking hate myself...

i give up... gonna rummage for flu medicine n pig out... nite nite world... till another day, i'll write down siew mai's story...