Slow month...

One month, but it feels like forever... Not that time past by slowly, it just that, it seems like everything's so comfortable that it seemed like a long time already...

Boo to Halo 2...

Have any of you heard Halo 2 is gonna have a midnite launch later? XBox & Halo fans are screaming yay, so might be avid gamers... But I'm screaming boo!!!

Firstly: My frog prince has to OT.. Hmm, OT good rite? NO!!! cos...
Secondly: he cannot claim OT!!!
Thirdly: he might have to work true the WHOLE nite.
Fourthly and MOST importantly: he's spending his bday working overnite... :-(
heartpain...

PMS week...

Lazy n tired me... haven't been blogging for a long long time...

i've passed my FTE... booked for FTT on the 23rd. Keep forgetting to ask boss for leave cos the FTT's in the afternoon... if dont catch tis date, the next slot is on 29th...

missed my driving on wed. no thanks to trakindo's order. stupid HPL pple!!! scheduled 2 bulk loadings in the morning, one west, one east... and they sent the tank in the afternoon!!! worse of all, the tank that should be drove to east plant to load went to west plant to load n vice versa... worst of all, in the hurry to load, it was fucking 3.30 and we knock off at 4.45, west plant forgot to check proforma that the driver brought along for loading, and LOADED!!! loaded wrong product nvr mind, STUPID tanks had product names stenciled on it! heng east side haven load yet... so bo pian, had to swing tank... de-caned the west loaded product into drums, flush the tank, sent samples to check if tank contaminated and then loaded the correct product into it... some had to stay till 9+... i went off at 8.15... n by the time i logged into bbdc webby to cancel driving, cannot cancel... call the customer service aso cannot... so i wasted 60 bucks like tt liao... haiz...

and me being so pms now, made my frog prince came over n buy me dinner... n made him stay till 11+... he so poor thing, overslept the next day... still feeling a bit guilty now...

Help help...

Issit good or bad whn u last saw someone abt 13 hrs ago n last sms tt same person abt 6 hrs ago, n now u're missing him already... aiyoh, y like tt? i should be "studying" for my FTE tmr... cannot concentrate ah... jiu ming ah... help help...

Dilemas...

All of the sudden, I have this bo liao idea... actually not bo liao after all... tt's to transfer my blog to somewhr else... seems like other blog servers offer much more stuff n control... like your layout, uploading of pics n midi/wav files. not that i'm unable to do it here, but its just too much of a trouble to do it here... plus u need good knowledge of html, for which i have none...

however, the biggie prob is the 190++, almost 200 entries to be transfered... n if u dun log in here for more thn 3 months, all previous entries will cease to exists, which means gone-ed... which will be most prob wht would happen if i move over to another blog, n not transfer my entries over... and which i think i'll spend abt an hour, copying n pasting the entries n changing the dates on them... argh... damn... i gotta quickly decide...

ignorant is bliss, so is being treated like a xing fu xiao gong zu (fortunate little princess)... but i prefer the princess part, though sometimes both is nice... life's full of contridictions, yeah? how long have i not felt this way? since foreva... cant remb whn i was treated like a princess... definately years ago... must enjoy while i can but cannot take it for granted... moments like tis, priceless... for everything else, i do hope thr's mastercard... (heh... k, i c crows fly by) but thr no free lunch in tis world, n the price i pay, lock's getting unlocked... which IS a good things after all...

Clams... not so yummy after all...

Jus got back frm a KTV session... took leave for Thurs n Fri to unwind n relax n rest properly... Got d whole day tmr to run errands, gotta replace an atm card n most impt of all, my ic...

i do feel something now already, but y am i still claming up? y am i such a bitch? how do i stop myself frm claming up? how? someone pls pls teach me n tell me how... help...

Time to wake up...

stupid dumb experiment i did on myself... wanted to c wht r those weird feelings abt... so i tried as hard as i could, not to clam myself up n open my heart a little...

experiment findings: guilty feeling towards another (A) becos of someone else (B)... Want A to kinda give up becos of B... But at the same time, dare not open up to B becos of C... I'm such a loser, afraid of getting hurt again, afraid of a lot of things... tt's y after such a short while, i decided to end the experiment...

i dunno if its due to the stubborn traits of cancerians, no means no... close means close, no opening up... but thinking through, if i dun open up, C will always be thr, and it'll be fucking unfair for B... y am i such a bitch? mayb wht ken said might be bullseye... mayb i'm really starting to feel something, but its the baggage i'm still holding on to and i dun realise it... which i think might be true cos during the experiment, i think i did feel something...

this is so freaking irritating n confusing... mayb its just time to get outta comfort zone n wake up...

Everything... AGAIN...

Flu kicked in again... 3rd time in 6 months, or rather, less than that... place too dusty or i'm not getting enuff rest?

Confessions hurt... to a certain extend... Weird feelings going thru me now... Cant decipher them at all... just weird, funny, even funnier... getting to suspect there's NO such thing as platonic friendship anymore... y do things have to turn out tis way... ken jus put it, u're just too cute n attractive lah... i think otherwise... pissed at myself... damn fucking pissed... y cant i have a simple pure platonic friendship that will stay put n last tt way... y must it be always, in the middle of such a nice friendship, things happen AGAIN... i fucking hate it... it must be me... i fucking hate myself...

i give up... gonna rummage for flu medicine n pig out... nite nite world... till another day, i'll write down siew mai's story...

Physically drained...

So "happening" last 2 weeks that I feel physically drained out...

18th: Last IVP match of the season. After dinner met some frds, played pool. After pool, sit down, tok cock... Reached home at 4am...

19th: Woke up at 7.30am to be in time in Kallang for J-league. Saw history making when Teck Whye Alumini softball team won Singapore National softball team. Shiok! Left Kallang ard 4pm. whn i reached home, slacked, tired out, slept early.

20th to 23rd: Work, stress out, using too much brain juice. After work was driving lessons or running errands. Reaching home on the avg of 8pm everyday, tired out...

24th: After work, went up to JB wif my colleagues for seafood and cheesecake!!! at only 4.90RM per slice, it was wonderful... If only i could buy every single slice back to SG. Reached home at 9.40pm. Rushed to bath, change and take my mahjong set. Played mahjong till 4+am. Went for supper/breakfast. By the time i slept, it was 6am already.

25th: Woke up by my dad at 9am. But fell back to sleep. Every few mins, he would come to try to wake me up again. For the next 45 mins, it was just a few mins eye shut, driftin to sleep, only to wake up again. finally got my butt up, bathe, changed and went out for brunch wif my family. After that, we went suntec carrfour to buy groceries and some car accessories. Our car, SFM4850Y is officially a week's old! Reached home ard 230pm, set up everything we have bought in the car. Slacked at home from 3-4pm. Left the house again to mit the gals. Window shopped for a while and we went to sakae for dinner. Left at 8pm, took a cab n rushed home. Put down some stuff, took some stuff, mit some friends from wholivesnearyou.com for a mooncake thingy... chit chat, supper, tok cock, reached home at 4+am. Slept at 5am...

26th (today): woke up at 1pm. ate lunch, now headache is kicking in... damn...

Gastric --> Stomach ulcer --> Stomach cancer

on MC today... Was feeling terrible on Monday already. Managed to scrap thru work ystday and went to the doc's in the evening...

doc asked since whn i had this kinda feeling my my tummy. told him quite some time back, but it came n go... only becoming more frequent now... he asked if it could be stress related... u're the doc, how in the hell would I know!? anyway, i din tell him tt lah, i just said i dunno... gave me gastric medication, famotidine... was wondering y not antacid. seems tt famotidine is stronger thn antacid.

correct me or the webbys that i went thru if i'm wrong... antacid for neutralizing the acidic affect in the gut. but famotidine, is for curing ulcers and reducing the gastric juice serection... now, tt really scares me! i betta start looking aft my tummy... eating medication on time. the tot of stomach ulcer n developing into stomach cancer really scares me...

May God, my Lord bless this lost sheep... Amen!