Blame it on my sensitivity and insecurity which have been with me for years.
I gotta admit you are quite a good catch albeit being a little round.
Although I do know there is no one else, it does not help that sometimes you would mention "find er nai".
Although I do know you love me only, it does not help that sometimes you mention that so many other girls out there would want you and can maybe consider.
Whenever I ask if you will not want me, ambiguous answers like "consider lah" does not help pacify a wondering insecure mind. You say I keep asking and it is very tiresome, but what are the answers are you giving me? Sometimes I have to ask a few times in a row before you give a reluctant "want lah".
Have you ever wondered if you had not given any ambiguous answer in the beginning, I would not keep asking.
Through your actions, I know how much you care about for me and love me, but your egoistic mouth says otherwise. It is because of the question marks that you give me then I would feel insecure. And now you are scolding me because I feel insecure.
You say you can't keep pacifying me, but it takes 2 hands to clap and it is a cause and effect thingy. I know you are too egoistic to say "I love you", but sometimes I really need real answers from you mah.
I can stop feeling insecure but it takes time.
I can stop feeling insecure but you have to stop the question marks.
I can stop feeling insecure if I stop doubting myself that I am good enough.
I can stop feeling insecure if you would lessen the words that would lead me to think that there are other girls that you can choose from.
From day 1, you know I am sensitive and insecure. I know you don't mean it, I know I'm being sensitive and insecure. It is not that I do not trust you.
And maybe you are right that since I'm not a perfect healthy person, no one else will want me because of the future burden except you. And maybe because of this, and the question marks, I feel insecure.
Characteristics are unlike habits which can be changed overnite. But if you don't help me, who will?
I know you can't stop saying such things because this is who you are. From egoistic to romantic, no one will be able to do it. But stop blaming and saying that I'm insecure. It would not help, right?
I'll just have to accept that you would not verbally tell me how much you love me and want me and then you'll have also to accept that I would feel insecure. I can't expect you to sweeten your words just to make me feel secure. It would not be correct, right?
I'm really sad and pissed. "Late night show" that led to a quarrel... All because I was really not comfortable. I was really worked up.
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